The Dash - Linda Ellis (1996)

I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone, from the beginning…to the end.

He noted that first came the date of her birth and spoke of the following date with tears,
but he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time that she spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved her know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own, the cars…the house…the cash.
What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash.

So, think about this long and hard. Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left that can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough to consider what’s true and real
and always try to understand the way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger and show appreciation more
and love the people in our lives like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect and more often wear a smile,
remembering that this special dash might only last a little while.

So, when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash…
would you be proud of the things they say about how you spent YOUR dash?


Saturday, November 9, 2013

A reflection as I turn 30 years old!

30 years old - wow, I can't believe how fast the last year flew by, much less my 20s.  But, the day has arrived!

I started my 29th birthday by establishing a 30 by 30 list, determined to accomplish every goal.  And, if you know me, I do not like to fail; I am an "A" type personality in every way.  But, guess what?  I did, in fact, fail to check off every item on my list - and actually, I am okay with it.  I did take care of some of my goals: I enjoyed a chocolate spa treatment with my sister at the Hershey Spa, finished our wills, did something truly spontaneous, bought a boat for Jon, learned to use chopsticks, went whale watching, taught Jon to play golf (and he can drive better than me already...grrr), started a gratitude journal, went a whole week without complaining about anything (that was huge for me as a person who always wants things to be perfect), got Jon to dance in the rain with me (he hates being wet), perfected a lot more than 10 new dessert recipes, lost a little weight (not nearly enough, but on the right track), am in the process of the master bedroom/bathroom remodel, and watched a little more than half of the AFI's greatest movies (although I don't really agree with most of the selections).

So, I didn't accomplish everything on my list.  The goal when I made that list was to set aside more time for myself.  I almost never have time to read for fun, take a class like cake decorating, or scrapbook.  Sometimes, I really envy people who say "I just finished [insert book title here] - read it if you get the chance" or "The babysitter is on the way so the hubby and I can go out for a date night".  But, you know what?  Me-time isn't really an option much these days, and I wouldn't want any other way.  I have a beautiful nine month old baby girl who has always been a mommy's girl.  She is still nursing and has been going through extreme separation anxiety for the last six weeks, not even wanting Daddy.  Before I know it, she is going to be perfectly fine spending a whole weekend with Mamaw and Papaw, away from Mommy and Daddy - and I'll be the one crying.  So, right now, I am trying to savor all that Mommy and Maddie time.  I also have an almost three year old boy which means I say "no" a million times a day, am continually pulling snacks out of cabinets/bags, and Disney and Nick Jr. songs are always playing in my head.  To top it off, my husband and I own a law practice in Indianapolis, so the success of that business means a lot to our family.

When I was 15 years old, I knew I wanted to be an attorney and have a family by 30 years old.  But when I pictured my life at 30, I pictured working in a big firm, striving to make partner and bring my family financial security, picking my kids up from daycare/preschool around 6 pm, making a quick dinner, putting the kids to bed and working a little more until bed, counting down to the weekends for rest and family time.  But, my life is very different than I pictured!  God's plan is so much better than that picture!!!  I have never missed either child's first word, first step, first tooth breaking through, etc.  I am able to spend all day with my munchkins at the office; Jonathan can play all day in his own space at the office, and Maddie can play at my feet while I write motions and letters to clients, manage office accounts, and file paperwork.  Some weeks Jon's desk and filing cabinets are stacked a foot high with files, we don't see Jon much because he is in court all over the state, and client payments don't come in when expected.  But, week after week, God is faithful - the bills always get paid and our needs are met, with money left over to buy Maddie a cute new dress, take the kids on a fun outing, and support the ministries and people we love.

So, I didn't finish my list, but hey, I have a whole lifetime to check items off my "bucket list".  The whole idea behind creating a "bucket list" is to challenge yourself to try new things, continually improve yourself, and not take the little time we have our earth for granted.  And, those are goals I work towards everyday.

"So, when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash…would you be proud of the things they say about how you spent YOUR dash?"
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